Happy V Day

Love is simply defined
by what it is...

Long 4 u

I need you
Like a blanket in the winter.
Like an ocean without water,
I long for you.
My heart leaps for joy
Every time I hear your voice.
My soul shivers
When I think of your touch.

I want you
Like ice cream on a sunny day;
Like the soil is to a plant
I need you.
You are what keeps me going.
Thoughts of you make me quiver
With you my love
Is ever flowing.

When the day is bright,
I long for you.
When night comes to take away light
I want you more.
Every night, I cling to my teddy bear
Wishing it was you.
I long for you my love.
I long to be with you always…

If you're miles apart from that special one; this is for you. True Love prevails in the long run.

Solution???

Many of us have fallen victim to sexual abuse during childhood.

Some of us are having problems in our relationships now
because we refused to address the past.
It's not easy to talk about but we have to try.
There is no moving forward
when you are holding on to pain from the past.
You cannot enjoy a new relationship
when you are holding on to what your former partner did to you.
You might not see what the future holds for you
when the past still controls you.
SPEAK UP about what you have been through.
SPEAK UP about rape
SPEAK UP about abuse

It's your first step to recovery........

Rape

I was reading a story online
about a 17 yr old Nigerian girl.
She was raped by her high school teacher
She couldn't tell anyone in order to avoid ridicule
The teacher ran away from the town shortly after the incident.
Months after, the girl found out that she was pregnant.

She told her sister who told her mother; then father.
The poor girl was beaten mercilessly
and disowned by the dad.
She has been abandoned by the entire family.

This brought tears to my eyes
because i still don't understand why people can be so cruel
and to think that her family will abandon her
after the traumatic experience is devastating....

Why can't Nigerian parents deal with rape?
How do we address the issue of rape in 9ja?
How do we educate people that a rape victim is not guilty of what happened to her?
What's your say to this?

Question

Should men of God
divorce and remarry?

Just a Friend 4!

*****Four Days Later*****

Shewa: They did what? You were a part of it? (shocked)

Isi: Someone had to deal with him.

Shewa: To be honest with you, I will be glad to hurt him really bad but desmond told me not to do anything. I was even begging him not to harm C in anyway. He told me he knows C will be dealt with but it won't involve him in anyway.

Isi: Exactly!

Shewa: And it had to be you?

Isi: You are very lucky shewa. You don't know how lucky you are. Are you mad at me for dealing with Chinedu on your behalf?

Shewa: (quiet)

Isi: Great! you'd better be quiet. You think it's every guy that can be like desmond? Girlfriend, Nigerian guys don't know how to deal with rape. When their girlfriend gets raped, they either dump her, ignore her or condemn her. They'd ask questions like what were you wearing? what kind of crowd have you been mingling with? what were you doing there in the first place? rather than condemn the immoral act being carried out. You are lucky, you know. Desmond is doing what every man out there should do. You might think you're okay but you are hurting deep inside but you are lucky because you have desmond to help you get through this.

(a little girl rushes inside to give the girls some news , shewa and isi hurried after her)

**30 Minutes later (Shewa's house)**

Shewa: You are heartless! How many people did you take with you?

Isi: Emeka, dede, jayjay, jude, and bayo.

Shewa: Bayo? Bayo No wonder! You know bayo is a beast now and you had to bring him along. I know you were fighting for me but look at the way they messed him up. I think it'll take 6 months for him to recover. You arranged for him to get beat up by 5 area boys ahhh

Isi: save me the story. What's your stress? He got what he asked for. Do you think you were the only one he raped? We've heard stories of girls he abused before and after you.

Shewa: So you told the boys what happened to me?

Isi: No. I lied to them and you know Emeka is very protective of me. If I had told them what happened to you, they would have killed him. Don't you think?

Shewa: What about the condition he is in? The boy is really messed up right now. Didn't you see his face?

Isi: If I didn't know you so well, I would accuse you of something else. Shewa, we live in a country where no one cares. This is 9ja for goodness sake. Bad stuffs happen everyday but justice is not carried out. You think rape is right? Do you know what it does to your mind? soul? body? You feel used. You feel worthless. You have problems in the future...you become scared every time a male comes around you. At times, you become violent. At times you get angry and you take it out on the wrong ones. What chinedu did was immoral and he needed to be punish to learn his lesson but no one would do it. If we throw him in jail, he'd get bailed and walk the streets like a saint. He got what he deserved

Shewa: and...

Isi: You are lucky you're not pregnant. We went to the doctor and they told you everything was fine with you. No STDs nothing. What if you'd gotten pregnant? We went to the doctors day before yesterday to get the other test results right? What if they said you had gonorrhea or God forbid HIV +? Would you be here feeling sorry for him? If we were outside Nigeria, I would let the law handle it but the law can't handle anything here. You are lucky to have desmond and I will keep saying it.

Shewa: Enough of that...

Isi: Enough of what? Shewa, you are lucky. (in tears) Why do you think I'm like this? Angry! Mean! Unforgiving! Everyone views me as a trouble maker and I can be violent...No one stood by me when I got raped.

Shewa: Oh My God (in tears)

Isi: It was a long time ago. It happened before we became friends. I was raped at the age of 15. I went to fetch water around 7 pm and I was on my way home when some guys jumped out of nowhere and carried me into the bush. I thank God they didn't kill me. I didn't have a choice in picking whom I wanted to lose my virginity to. They deprived me of my pride... I cried for many nights. I couldn't tell anyone... you know how it is with Nigerian parents and the issue of sex. When my dad knew about my pregnancy, he kicked me out. All my pleas, explanations fell on deaf ears. I slept under an abandoned house for many months.. I suffered a lot . I lost the baby though... i had a miscarriage. Later on, I knew who the rapists were but I could not do anything.. I've been angry since then.. I Just hate...

Shewa: (hugs isi) It's okay. Say no more. We'll get through this together. I'll be here for you and I'll help you get past your pain and mine. Let's just put all these behind us.

{Both weeps silently}


Chinedu didn't know who hurt him and they couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't say it was revenge because he had too many victims. If they were to revenge, he'd be gone. You see this RAPE thing.. it happens to other people; you say "poor her" "how sad." When it happens to you, it's everything. If you know of a rapist, tell on him/her. Let's stop the violence against females. April was SAAM - Sexual Assault Awareness Month. That's why I started this story. Although it is 100% fiction coming from me, it's real. Your best friend could be going through what we're talking about here. Get the word out there. LET's FIGHT THE BATTLE TOGETHER. Women's assault has got to stop.

Hope you all enjoyed the story. Let's hear your thought. What do you think of the characters?

Just a Friend!

Shewa: What more do you want from me? What else can I do? Is it a crime to say NO? You don't have to insult me just because of everything that happened. When I choose abstinence, it should not bother you. After all it's my life and you have no say in it. Leave me alone.

Chinedu: Excuse me?

Shewa: I said it's my life and you have no say in it. You have no control over me. You are not my husband.

Chinedu: Oh really?

Shewa: Yes really! I'm out of here.

{Shewa attempts to leave and he grabs her car keys before she could get it. He stuffed it into his pocket.}

Shewa: What is the meaning of all this? C, I do not have time for your tantrums. Give me my keys so I can leave.

Chinedu: You are not going until I say you can. Every time we have an argument, you want to walk away. You never deal with the problem. Nothing gets resolved. You are going to seat down and we will talk about this.

Shewa: I have nothing to say to you

Chinedu: I have a whole lot to say to you. Please sit down.

Shewa: Give me my keys first. (he hands her the keys and she takes a seat)

Chinedu: I don't like us quarreling. You know I love you and I care about you. I don't like what you said earlier on. What do you mean by me not having control over you? Are you trying to say I'm not man enough to handle you?

Shewa: Who said anything about you being less than a man? C I am not your wife. I am not your girlfriend either. I do not appreciate the way you address me.

Chinedu: What's your problem? You want to act like you don't want me?

Shewa: (harshly) No I don't!

Chinedu: Oh really?

Shewa: yes really!

Chinedu: You don't want me? I didn't know that! I could recall you moaning my name the last time we did it.

Shewa: Did what? I am out of here!

Chinedu: Don't walk away from this! You know you want it.

Shewa: Get your hands off me nowww

Chinedu: and if I don't

Shewa: C leave me alone or I'll screa...

(he covers her mouth before she could complete the sentence).

To be continued...

I just Wonder

They met and became friends
She fell for him
and wanted more than friendship.
She became close to him
talked with him
spent a lot of time with him.
He liked her personality
and didn't mind being friends with a beautiful angel like her.
She invited him over
and showed him around the house
After a while, they sat
together on the couch
staring at nothing.
She looked at him
He looked at her
She moved close and kissed him
He couldn't resist so he responded
Slowly and gently, they had each other.

They saw each other more often
She became one he couldn't do without
He realized he had fallen for her.
He told all his friends about her.
One day, he picked a ring for her
After all they had known each other for a while
After all they were in love and they cared for each other
why not spend all their lives together?
He intended to surprise her
by asking for her hand in marriage.
On getting to her house
he saw her coming out of the house
hand in hand with another man
an older man to be precise.

She denied knowing him
and said he could have been the real estate agent
he was shocked and hurt.
He hurried away.
He couldn't eat or sleep
his life was completely shut
His world was falling apart
His best friend couldn't even console him
He sat at his work desk and cried
like a baby craving mama's milk.
She shut him out completely
She didn't call or return his calls
He wondered if he was just a fling
He wondered if he wasn't good enough
But he realized he was wrong
He was everything she wanted in a man
but she was already married to an older man.
She was married before she met and fell for him.
She never told him.

I cannot help but wonder. Do men still cry over women? With everything I see around me, I cannot help but ask if a love like this exists... I mean the kind that shatters a whole man's world when he sees his love is slipping away... DO real men cry over women they love?

4 Magic Word II

Seconds grew into minutes, minutes into hours, hours into days, days into weeks, weeks into months, and months into year. ohhh I felt the 4 magic word at last.

The 4 Magic Word = L-O-V-E.

When knocked down, you'd think you might never get up for fear of being knocked again. In my case, I fell and didn't bother to get up because I fell in love. Truly, it's just 4 letters but it carries so much meaning; it feels like words... sentences...paragraphs.

Anyway, you were not pleased that I was spending too much time with my boys. I couldn't understand why you were upset at the time. Being the stubborn person I was, I refused to hearken to your warnings... you said you wouldn't talk to me anymore and I was like whatever. I felt like if you ignored me, other friends are there to talk to. I didn't understand what it meant to have you but I knew I had fallen when you were right in front me. You didn't talk to me. I was not upset but I was hurt deep inside....why oh why?

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

Is this what falling in love means? You don't see the person and your entire day is distabilized. You see the person frowning and you're worried to death about what could be wrong with the person. You see the one and you blush and hide in the bathroom. He calls you the same thing everyone calls you ,yet it sounds so special coming from him. I was really into you but it was obvious - you loved me more.


J.S.S 3
We kept our moments a secret. Even if other students okayed it, our teachers must not see us together. I told you I didn't want my friends to know about us (they'd tease and it can be annoying) and you were okay with that. You'd sit behind me in class kick me gently. You'd seat on the other end of the class with your head on the desk. You never listened to what the teacher had to say; you were captivated by my beauty. You never brought a pen to class, you were always borrowing mine so we seized that as a medium of communication. I'd write you cute little love notes (teeny winy), fold it neatly and squeeze it into the pen cover. I gently insert the pen into its cover and throw it . Sometimes you'd come get the pen. You walk back to your seat with a huge smile on your face.

We had good times. We had wonderful memories. I didn't know what love was until you came along. You were the true definition of love. We couldn't hide our secret for long...all because of you. Everyone knew me as the class captain that couldn't stand you. You and your friends were the big boys in the class and others girls felt dating one of you would be a priviledge. Two of your friends knew me as your gurl and 1 of my girl friend knew about us. Everyone else knew nothing.

Our secret came out when.......

SS 1- (10th grade)

It was the end of the semester. We usually have a week [a full week after exams when students just come to school and socialize. Attendance was not mandated during this period] of fun. S.S 3 (12th grade) students threw class parties everyday during this week. Other students could do the same but everyone was excited about going to the senior party. All my friends/our classmates went to the party from Mon - Wed. You didn't come to school and I was worried. I sat alone. Friends urged me to come to the party but I declined until thursday. I went to the seniors party and the seniors were actually excited to have their Chapel prefect there.

They were out to get me. In no time, I mingled and ehmmm they played the common game back then "Devil's Basket." For those that don't know, it's similar to spin the bottle. Devil's basket = (Passing round a small bowl/small basket with papers while the music is playing. If the music stops while the basket is in your end, you pick one of the lil wrapped up notes, read it out and do whatever it says. Failure to do so results in payment of some token perhaps, your lunch money).

When the music stopped, I was like oh no they didn't. Anyway I got up and picked a paper. I smiled after reading the contents. I was told to mention 5 song titles by Craig David. I was like shhh that's as easy as ABC. I was so excited, i went blank. I was able to come up with 4 song titles. The MC urged any guy from my class to help me out. One of my boys (nickname: ID) had my back. I thought I was done but they said I had to thank him for his help by dancing with him. They played some slow music and I yelled "Oh heavens NO." Out of curiosity, they asked me what genre of music i wanted and I told them makossa/soukous would do. There you have it,I've been a fan of the congolese/cote d'ivoire/cameroon for ages. My pal and I danced and headed back to our seats... it was a fun day.

On friday which was the last day of school. The day when we go on break (a month or so). I was contemplating on going to the senior party again since you didn't show up. My only girl friend came to me to tell me you were at school. I told her it couldn't be because you'd never come to school without saying hello to me. You usually stopped by my class to check on me before heading to your class. We were in SS 1 and yall know that they split yall up depending on your concenration. As a SS student, you either belonged to the science class, commercial class, or arts class. I was an art student.

Anyway my friend said you were mad at me because I danced with ID. Why would you be mad at me for dancing with someone? It wasn't like I was all up on him or anything. My girl friend was like " so you went to the party yesterday cause i was not in school. I was told you participated in devil's basket. They asked you to list 5 song titles and you did. You also said you'd like to dance. They played makossa for you and you objected. You asked for one slow song by celien dion. They said you held ID like he was your man and you two were grooving seriously...."

I didn't even let her finish because I could not contain myself. I was dying with laughter. Heheheheh so that's what they told him and he's upset... Whatever happened to trust? My friend didn't even let me go on. she had more to say. " he said since you've decided to do as you please, you might as well move on with ID."

Ewooo o you shocked me by saying that. I was so mad at you for not even checking with me before concluding. Was that why you showed up on friday when you missed school from mon - thursday. I was disappointed that you had little trust for me. I was hurt that you'd just ask to move on for such a silly thing. I was ready to give you a piece of my mind. As I walked up the stairs to your class, I could hear you going off on ID. Everyone was like what? what? why should you get mad cause i danced with ID? Are u her father or what? Come o, e be like say something dey between two of una..Within a few minutes, the news spread amongst school that we were official.

I could not bear the little noses being poked at me every corner. I went back to class to cool off. When everyone calmed down a little, I was set to come upstairs and give u a piece of my mind. I walked up the stairs and my girlfriend, and ID followed me. I looked back to apologise to ID for the embarassment you put him through. I looked back up (to go up the stairs) and you were standing in front of me. I was so upset that I decided not to talk. I didn;t even bother to look into your face. I asked you to step aside so I could go up the stairs. You didn't move. Instead you called my name... I melted deep inside but managed to frown as I looked up at you.

You didn't let me say anything. You apologised for everything and assured me that we were okay. HMMmmmmm

FAST FORWARD

We were about to begin our last semester when I came to America. You were the last one I saw on the day I departed. You tried to fight the tears but I could see it in your eyes. You held my hands and you were not willing to let go. I on the other hand could not even hug you because I knew I'd never be able to pull away from your embrace. I was going to re-unite with my parents (whom i had not seen in 5 years) and I didn't know when I was coming back home.

Those hours on the flight went by with me lost in thoughts....

FAST FAST FORWARD

Communication was great
but
distance became a barrier.
I look back at how we started
and I cannot help but give thanks to God
for teaching me the meaning of love
by blessing me with you.

It's been 6 years since we saw each other
we're still close.. it's like we're next to each other.

"There are two kinds of Love. The first kind of love burns just like the sun shines in the day and then it dies at night. The second kind is like the moon that's there all the time. The sun doesn't let it shine at day but it shines to shed light in your darkest night. This kind of Love that burns through day, night, storms, and never fades is the kind I have for you, will you be mine?"

You called this blue note Burning Love.
I thank my papa in heaven that our love is still burning. ..

On this Valentine's day,
I want to thank you for
helping me feel what I call the
4 Magic Word - LOVE
I thank you and I miss your presence.

N100 Worth of Time

** SUNDAY UPDATES **

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: "Daddy, may I ask you a question?"

DAD: "Yeah sure, what is it?" replied the man. "

SON: "Daddy, how much do you make an hour?"

DAD: "That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?" the man said angrily. "

SON: "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?"

DAD: "If you must know, I make N100 an hour."

SON: "Oh," the little boy replied, with his head down.

SON: "Daddy, may I please borrow N50?"

The father was furious, "If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I work hard everyday for such this childish behavior."

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think: Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that N50 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.

"Are you asleep, son?" He asked.

"No daddy, I'm awake," replied the boy.

"I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier" said the man.

"It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the N50 you asked for."

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. "Oh, thank you daddy!" He yelled.

Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

"Why do you want more money if you already have some?" the father grumbled.

"Because I didn't have enough, but now I do," the little boy replied.

"Daddy, I have N100 now. Can I buy an hour of your time?
Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you."

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.

It's just a short reminder to all of us working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts.

Do remember to share that N100 worth of your time with someone you love.

If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours.
But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than to our family.

SUNDAY

Years I spent in vanity and pride,
Caring not my lord was crucified,
Knowing not it was for me he died on
Calvary

Mercy there was great, and grace was free
Pardon there was multiplied to me
There my burdened soul found liberty at
calvary

OLAMILD : {screams} CALLLLLLLVARYY

By God's word at last my sin I learned;
Then I trembled at the law I'd spurned,
Till my guilty soul imploring turned to

OLAMILD: {screams} CALLLVARYYYYYYYY

I believe I was the loudest when it came to the 'CALVARY' part. It was the only line I knew in the hymn that was rendered at church. I know we've all had similar experiences. When we hear a song, we mumble and sing silently until it gets to the part we really know. Service was fun and we give thanks to God for that. I came home to clean the house and I headed out with my sis. We volunteered to represent 9ja by dancing at the international concert that was held at WCC. We met with 2 other girls from Nigeria and we quickly changed to our outfits...

Nothing fancy- a tanktop, black leggings, green glittery wrapper, beads representing the nigerian flag, green and white strings attached/braided into our hair...I believe one of the girls has the pictures. If it turns out well, I'll share some. We danced to 'Coupe Decale' by teeyah. We represented Nigeria with our outfit and represented a huge part of Africa with the dance moves. We walked all sorts of traditional steps into the dance...sparkle was even trying to work soulja boy into it.. DOn't tell her i told you o. Oh well everyone got to do as they pleased when it got to the free styl portion. All of the other steps were co-ordinated by me.

Announcer: I introduce you all to a group called AREWA from Nigeria (lights dim)

Audience: Yayyyyyyy (applause)

We walk up to the stage and stood there for good 2 mins and the music did not start. Thank God I was closer to the exit.. I exited to find out what was going on and they said our CD did not read... what? 4 where? I had to get the girls off the stage, while the audience gave them a round of applause... We went to the tech pple and they gave us a CD that says Nigerianne. WHAT? THat's not our CD. My Cd says Coupe Decaler teeyah....talk of commotion, anger, 9ja madness... we were roaming the halls grumbling. I just went to my car and got another CD (thank God i had extras) and we went back after the columbian pple did their dance.

What if I didn't have an extra cd? Imagine if it was you, what would you have done?

.................................................................................................................
Hardwork and Dedication brings good thing in life. life's a struggle and you have to face tough situations and conquer them to be called - Successful.

" when you take short cuts in life, you get cut short." REv Run said it, what do you think?

The Ring

A girl named Lisa.. this is her story.

Lisa: I was all alone at home on one lovely day. I decided to go for a walk. I walked miles after miles, while listening to my walkman. All of a sudden, thunder striked..lightning followed. I knew I was in for a shocking rain. Turning back to walk home would be a stupid choice because I would get wet. I walked to a bus stop, and tried to stop a motor cycle to no avail. It started raining. It rained heavily. I didn't know what to do, I just stood there with the hope of getting home safe. All of a sudden, I was being covered by an umbrella. I looked to my right to see the most handsome guy on planet earth. I don't often talk to strangers, but he was trying to help. I'd be a fool to reject his help. Thanks, I said with gratitude. A few minutes later, he stopped a motor cycle for me. I thanked him again and offered him his umbrella which he refused. "You need it more than I do". I thanked him and left. I couldn't stop thinking about this mystery guy that came out of nowhere to save the day.

* * * * * *

2 weeks after this occurence, I ran into this same guy at a friend's party. I was surprised that he still recognized me. I smiled and said "sorry I didn't bring your umbrella". He just laughed.." You didn't know we'd meet again". I felt stupid for saying that but I didn't know what was coming out of me. I know I skipped a heartbeat. We exchanged contact info and departed.. I started seeing him 3 months after the party. He was not just an ordinary guy, he was perfect. He shows love and affection in every way that he could. I could recall an incident that happened one xmas. I left his gift at home thinking I had packed it with some other gifts that I took to church. I'm sorry I don't have your gift here with me. We can go over to my place so you get it, I said with a cute voice. "You don't have to. You are the best gift one could ever ask for. I am glad I have you and I love you." I guess you know what follows that. A kiss sealed with gratitude. We had a lot of good memories. We loved more than we argued. HE was the best thing that ever happened to me, he still is. 25th of december 2006, a day that I will forever cherish.

He bought me lots of gifts. He brought some flowers which I took from him with a huge smile. He took it back from me, and pulled one particular flower which he stroked around my hair. He dropped the flower, I attempted to pick it up and he did the same. It was like we planned it. I noticed that the flower made an unusual sound. "I got it," he whispered. I stood up and looked down on him as he picked up the flower...alas... a RING. I inhaled with my hands on my mouth.

"over the past few years, you have stirred me with your smile. Your sharp looks and your cute dimples always put a smile on my face. When I am cold thinking I have no one to hold, you've here.... right beside me. Each and every day, I learn to appreciate you more. I have come to realize that I need you more than you think I do. I want to make you my confidante. I want you to be mine forever. I love you and I'm hoping you feel the same way too. Will you marry me?"

I screamed with excitement. I was astonished and happy. I didn't know what to say.. I could hear soft whispers of yes yes from within. I screamed YEs I will. Yes YEs YEs. He got up, placed the ring on my finger, and kissed me passionately. That was the happiest day of my life. We had a toast and celebrated briefly.

Last week, I went to my best friend's house for a sleep over. We decided to pay her cousin a visit.....other girls were there as well. We did some girl talk, watched movies, cried and sang. I wanted to help my friend's cousin with the dishes. I took off my ring, placed it on the counter and washed the dishes. I washed and cleaned my hands. I headed to the counter to get my ring and realized it was missing. I called the attention of everyone to the issue. Everyone claimed they didn't see it. I blacked out for about 5 mins..

As of today, I'm still searching for the ring. My fiance is out of town. He should be back in 2 weeks. what do I say to him? How do I tell him this story?

Males
Would you ever forgive your girl if such happened?
Would u be willing to even hear her out?

Females
How do you explain such to your man?
What would be your justification as to not being careless?

Note: Originally posted on NW when I wrote it.

BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL

Wear black Today to Support Jena 6

Hit me baby one more tyme...

After the encounter with my first love, I vowed not to date any man again. I don't know what went wrong. We seemed perfect for each other but we were constantly arguing. We had to let go of each other for the betterment of each other. He still loves me and I still love him but we can't be together as of now.... why? I don't know. His family moved to Texas and I'm here.. just stuck in Ohio. .hmmmmmmmm

the moment phil walked away, I felt like every good thing left me , but I was wrong........Lekan came along

He was rough and tough.. nothing like what I wanted in a guy but he was good to me. He was caring. loving, and trust worthy. He was new to love even though he had dated many girls. I could recall a day I wanted to enter the hallway, he walked into tha hallway, kicked the door open for me to enter. The door almost hit me and I wondered why he couldn't just hold it for me to walk in. ... he did a lot of things that I cannot even start to mention. More than anything, he wanted to be loved. He wanted me to love him as much as he loved me but it was hard. I had loved phil and i could never love anyone as much as I had loved him. Lekan knew about phil; he urged me to let go of the past. "I love you and I believe I deserve your love," he said sometimes ago.

"That's really wierd," I yelled out loud one day. I couldn't recall what he did but he got offended when I said he was a wierd person. "I'm wierd? that means I'm not good enough for you. You can't appreciate what I do? You don't even appreciate me. You can't beg me for anything.. I guess it's impossible since you have someone you cry to on the phone!"

I was speechless for almost ten minutes. All I could ask myself was does he even know what wierd means? anyway, he apologised. We became closer and people thought we were dating. I guess it's easy for them to say because we hung out a lot. His presence brings joy and laughter but I was not what he wanted me to be. He wanted me to be deeply in love but I couldn't force myself. We decided to give us a try but I was unhappy because nothing changed. We were just the way we used to be. Lekan has a problem... when it comes to saying "I don't know what that means...or can u explain better because I don't want to misinterprete you?"... he had big issues. He'd rather pretend to know something and just fuse around than admit to not knowing it and get help.

I went to the salon on saturday and he was supposed to pick me up. He came with a very nice car and I wondered where he got it from. He told me his car broke down and he had to rent a car for the meantime. I entered the car, he hit the start button and the car started. "hgmmmm impressive!" was my response and we both laughed. We listened to the same song over and over and I told him to change the cd or skip to the next song. He said he was not going to change it because he liked the song.

{ ABout 3 hours later... evening}

We were heading to a friend's house and the same song was still playing. " My friend set this song to repeat itself so we're stuck with it", he said. " You can change it now that he's not here, I'm sick of hearing the same song over and over," I said. "I'm not changing it!", he replied. "You are not changing it or you don't know how to? I don't like the fact that u tend to pretend when u don't know something. If I don't know something, I let u or anyone know. that's how u learn. there's no need to act like we know all." was my response.

"GBOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHH"








.................sound of a heavy blow on my head. If he wasn't driving, it would have been worst. "How dare you talk to me like that. You need to shut the hell up sometimes. You think you can just insult me and get away with it? All you do is open your mouth to insult believing you're the smartest. Don't you know it hurts when you talk like that? I know how to change the song........" HE yelled at the top of his voice and fumbled with the cd player. I sat there holding my head in shock. The fist was heavy and painful; I was hurt and i almost cried. I took my phone and he looked at me surprised; he thought I was going to dial 911.

Instead, I deleted his number and messages from my phone. When we got to the red light, he held my hand and said sorry.

"Get your hands off me now!".... I yelled non stop and he left me alone. He drove me home and I went straight to bed. About an hour later, my phone rang and.... "hello sade, I'm sorry for what happened today, I didn't mean to..."

"Look here lekan, I don't want to talk about this nonsence. Good night and Good bye" **tone**

QUESTION 4 ALL:

What will you do if you were sade?
Why do some men think hitting a lady is the solution to problems?
What do you think of the story?
What would you have changed about any character in this short story?

NOTE: Originally posted on NW when I first wrote it.

THIS DAY

HELLO EVERYONE

Read this first ... MY BROTHER'S BIRTHDAY

How was your weekend/labor day break? Hope yall read about my weekend on my other blog...I'm finally done with that bookstore job...back to school.. sunday's service was wonderful...a bride to be has been bugging ma padi (shud i say manager) with phone calls...her wedding is holding on the last saturday of this month and she wants us to crash it..... i really want yall to leave a bday wish/message for my brother.....I have to attend a kid's bday by fire by force (next month)...got a call from the classy celebrant...it's been a great but hectic week. I know u all are bouncing in the lord everyday. I don't know if I should say I'm excited .. I guess I am. I got tagged by Unnaked Soul . The post was titled unimaginable and I guess this is a continuation or should i say a chapter of the unimaginable...

If I could create
I would make wings for everyone so they can travel everywhere freely.

If I could create
I would make a blanket that can bring the dead back to life, when wrapped around them.

If I could create
I would love itself for it has lost its meaning

If I could create
I would make the rain shower every dish everyone desires

If i could create
I would the one that completes me.

If I could create
I'd make hair lotion that can make hair grow the very moment it touches the scalp.

If I could create
I would take love out of the one i don't want to hurt and replace it with likeness because it's the best i can give back.

If I could create
I would a pen called straight A's.

If I could create
I would a ship in the moon...for all mummies on mother's day.

If I could create
I'd make a wand that makes all dreams come true

If I could create
I would a time machine that goes in the past and corrects all my misdeeds.

If I could create
I would a shirt made with hugs just for my brother's bday (sept 6)

If i could create,
I would make a reunion for all blogville members

If I could create
I would a tap filled with love for the one who tagged me and opened my mind to what i wish I could create.

Here is a copy of the message i got (via email) from my friend Da Prince. I felt it was worth sharing. i hope u enjoy it as much as i did.

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.

"I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look bysaying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in thebedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine,honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

I then said "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was goingto kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....

Just 3 Words

I apologise for not updating frequently. I've been quite busy with work and school and i believe yall understand... I want to say happy bday to princessa... sorry I missed it. happy bday, married life, new job etcetera to all....I am in between a wedding a birthday party today. I was to graze a birthday party with a song or poem.... the wedding is also a must attend for the bride is a lovely friend of my church... ahhhhhh twas a hard choice and i settled for the bday party which i will be attending a few hours from now with my hair looking like a squirrel's tail. It's a very busy weekend cus i have another occasion to attend tomorrow. It will be taking place at cobo hall. I wish you all a won-der-full weekend and i am sharing 3 words with you. Keep it and use it.

There are many things that you can do to strengthen your relationships.Often the most effective thing you can do involves saying just three words.When spoken sincerely, these statements often have the power to develop new friendships, deepen old ones and even bring healing to relationships that have soured.The following three-word phrases can be tools to help develop every relationship.

1. Let me help
Good friends see a need and then try to fill it. When they see a hurt they do what they can to heal it. Without being asked, they jump in and help out.

2. I understand you.
People become closer and enjoy each other more when the other person accepts and understands them. Letting your spouse know - in so many little ways - that you understand them, is one of the most powerful tools for healing your relationship. And this can apply to any relationship.

3. I respect you
Respect is another way of showing love. Respect demonstrates that another person is a true equal. If you talk to your children as if they were adults you will strengthen the bonds and become closer friends. This applies to all interpersonal relationships.

4. I miss you.
Perhaps more marriages could be saved and strengthened if couples simply and sincerely said to each other "I miss you." This powerful affirmation tells partners they are wanted, needed, desired and loved. Consider how important you would feel, if you received an unexpected phone call from your spouse in the middle of your workday, just to say "I miss you."

5. Maybe you're right.
This phrase is very effective in diffusing an argument. The implication when you say "maybe you're right" is the humility of admitting, "maybe I'm wrong". Let's face it. When you have an argument with someone, all you normally do is solidify the other person's point of view. They, or you, will not likely change their position and you run the risk of seriously damaging the relationship between you. Saying "maybe you're right" can open the door to explore the subject more. You may then have the opportunity to express your view in a way that is understandable to the other person.

6. Please forgive me
Many broken relationships could be restored and healed if people would admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and failures. A man should never be ashamed to own up that he has been in the wrong, which is saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.

7. I thank you.
Gratitude is an exquisite form of courtesy. People who enjoy the companionship of good, close friends are those who don't take daily courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank their friends for their many expressions of kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle of friends is severely constricted often do not have the attitude of gratitude.

8. Count on me
A friend is one who walks in when others walk out. Loyalty is an essential ingredient for true friendship. It is the emotional glue that bonds people. Those that are rich in their relationships tend to be steady and true friends. When troubles come, a good friend is there indicating "you can count on me."

9. I'll be there
If you have ever had to call a friend in the middle of the night, to take a sick child to hospital, or when your car has broken down some miles from home, you will know how good it feels to hear the phrase "I'll be there." Being there for another person is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly present for other people, important things happen to them and us. We are renewed in love and friendship. We are restored emotionally and spiritually. Being there is at the very core of civility.

10. Go for it
We are all unique individuals. Don't try to get your friends to conform to your ideals. Support them in pursuing their interests, no matter how far out they seem to you. God has given everyone dreams, dreams that are unique to that person only. Support and encourage your friends to follow their dreams. Tell them to "go for it."

B o n u s : 11. I love you
Perhaps the most important three words that you can say. Telling someone that you truly love them satisfies a person's deepest emotional needs. The need to belong, to feel appreciated and to be wanted. Your spouse, your children, your friends and you, all need to hear those three little words: "I love you." Love is a choice. You can love even when the feeling is gone.

CLICK TO READ ABOUT MY FUN FILLED WEEKEND